self-medication

i was looking at the posts i put up way back in november 2007, when this blog was very recently conceived. i wanted to measure the differences between my writings from so long ago and my writings in more recent times. what i found was pretty astounding.

my older posts tended to be more detailed, yet at the same time more... how do i say this... detached. well i mean sure i shared inside jokes and divulged my fair share of complicated emotions, but at the same time it seems as if i was writing to no one in particular. it was apparent that my blog was serving its purpose extremely well: that of a personal documentary, an autobiography free of outside influences and prejudices if you will.

however, as time wore on, the posts changed. the way i wrote began to deviate wildly, with the content straying far from my original intent. i realised that the posts took on more... LIFE. they started to leave behind the cold, neutral pondering that characterised my blog for some time, in exchange for warmth, feeling... PERSONALITY! interested, i tried to examine this anomaly. why and how such a... to be frank, WELCOME, change took place. and came up with a most satisfactory answer.

i mentioned before lauhan-loong.blogspot.com is a reflection of yours truly. it would display my thoughts, feelings, experiences and opinions. this would be done with brutal honesty, because to quote my very first post "this is MY blog". keeping that in mind, it seemed apparent that my self possesion(and, by extension, my unwaveringly practical view of everything) would be a dominant feature of many, if not all, of my posts.

but things change, and with them, people. i am no exception, as my posts readily testify. me lovelies, its because of the fostering of new, and the bolstering of old, friendships which greatly influenced me for the better. i discovered that my blog began to become more... enjoyable, as people in my life began to exert varying degrees of care and attention.

nowadays, i write because i love to inspect how my interactions with the afore mentioned people sway my usually unshakable perceptions of life. emotionally, philosophically, spiritually... religiously even. its awesome to say the least.

thus, im no longer just writing for myself. im writing for all these people whove made a visible impact on my life. with this blog evolving the way it is, my friends can admire the changes theyve helped me to make, watch as their contributions culminate in my being a better, more lovely person. : )

heres to hoping things stay the way they are. good night to you me lovelies.

Third Eye Blind's Semi-Charmed Life

I want something else
To get me through this
Semi-charmed kind of life, baby, baby
I want something else, I'm not listening when you say
Goodbye

I believe in the sand beneath my toes
The beach gives a feeling an earthy feeling
I believe in the faith that grows
And the four right chords can make me cry
When I'm with you I feel like I could die
And that would be all right, all right